Best way to approach a man at a bar or other public setting?

Viewing 21 posts - 1 through 21 (of 21 total)
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  • #20143
    PrometheanFlame
    Participant

    @Dragons

    Yeah, humanity is going to have to endure a lot of pain to get through this one. That’s just part of the evolutionary process. How much pain that’s ultimately required depends on how resistant humanity is to growth. It doesn’t have to be this way, though. Humanity has collectively chosen/voted for the current conditions. As a whole, humans have become incredibly stagnant in terms of spiritual advancement with the exception of relatively small, isolated pockets of individuals. Massive corrections are needed to return man back on it’s proper course. This unfortunately won’t be easy to say the least. Not everyone is going to make it, but those who survive the calamities will be tasked with rebuilding the world for the future. We can only hope the best of us survive while the worst of us are erased permanently from the gene pool.

    Hypergamy in itself is beneficial to the gene pool. It only becomes a problem when it becomes maladaptive pathology. The hypergamous drive for a woman to select the best mate and secure resources is NOT for herself, but for her children and future generations! This is what modern women get wrong. They’ve made it all about themselves and their own greedy, materialistic desires which are becoming increasingly insatiable. Everything about female mate selection is hardwired at a biological level towards ensuring the next generation and all those that follow have the best possible outcomes. It’s been warped in modern women to the point of mental illness. They delay or completely neglect the satiation of their maternal instincts, leaving them unfulfilled yet still driving them unconsciously, leading to aforementioned pathology. It’s easy to understand when we relate this to a primal level of instinct. It’s incredibly simple.

    #20121
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Modern society is just that, modern, and it will take many steps to get back to tradition. Although, I admire the old ways I’m willing to be open enough accept a man how he is initially and engage in conversation, and of course, like has been stated in this thread, I think it’s easier for the women. I totally understand where men are coming from because now all women are tens and can do no wrong, and they all deserve prince charming who is six foot blonde and blue eyed and makes ,100k yearly! Social media,Hollywood,pornography has warped the human mind so pervasively that that is has wrecked female and male mating standards.It may take some alternative routes in the meantime till civilization is purged and clean and back on track. Either way, we must secure the existence of white children now and the future white children by whatever means necessary. As a woman, we hold the keys to sex, the gatekeeper so to say, that’s why we tend to be picky and hypergamous. we are all slaves to nature and women try to secure the best genetics whether they knowingly do it or not. We cannot change our nature, but we can understand and work with it. There is a lot to this, but obviously women can only have one child at a time, while men can create many children in that same time. This is also why promiscuity ruins society, lowers standards, genetics, etc. Everyone needs to stop being a slut and keep a high standard. Especially women, it’s about value. What is easy to get has no value,what is hard to get has value.

    #20116
    PrometheanFlame
    Participant

    @Dragons

    From a traditionalist point of view, I’d say that it’s inappropriate for a woman to approach a man, but conditions have changed so much that many men are checking out of the dating market and becoming more uninterested in pursuing women. Women are going to have to work harder than they ever have before to secure a truly good man. That might include making the first move and walking up to men they’re attracted to and giving them some sort of compliment. Feminism has come a long way in deterring men from approaching women. Lots of broken dudes out there unwilling to risk it anymore for a woman. Reduced to casual encounters and non-commital, transient relationships. True warriors never give up the fight, though.

    #20112
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I would also like to know how everything is going for you now. Any luck? There are some interesting tid bits of information here from both he men and women. I personally believe that men like to be approached, but I like to be purposely inviting. I smile, wave, ask, how are you doing? Sometimes I will say, you look familiar,or have we met, you look familiar? Usually a lot can be surmised after the initial approach because you never know their attitude or availability till you speak with them for a little bit. I think men love women and even if they are not interested they love to be approached by women.

    #20111
    A_Spartan_Speaks
    Participant

    I avoid bars and clubs but have found that book stores and grocery stores are good venues for approaching and meeting women.

    #20104
    PrometheanFlame
    Participant

    @V

    I’m curious about how it’s going for you now. It’s been almost a year. What’s your strategy now? Any luck?

    I can’t fathom how PUA advice/game is applicable to women, especially ones looking for a traditional gentleman. All that advice is to coach men specifically about how to get a woman’s attention and help them stand out from other men. Savvy pickup lines and NLP has it’s limitations, though.

    Networking with people who have what you want already (in this case, a traditional and healthy marriage) and hanging out where they hang out seems to be the ticket. It’s been said a few times already but it bares repeating: bars are no place to find a family-oriented gentleman, if that’s what you’re looking for.

    #16800
    V
    Participant

    I haven’t checked this in years. I have to say, Prussian Blue has some good advice. I have also learned, that bars are a terrible place to meet decent men! They are full of scoundrels typically. I gave up on the bar scene altogether and just focus on meeting people while enjoying activities I like. Works much better 🙂

    #12565
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    @Alpin! @OstwindWolf

    Thank you for your input and advice! I am sure the ladies have now much more information and knowledge.

    And I agree with you, OstwindWolf, that places like pubs, bars or discos are NOT the right place to look for a trad man.

    I suspect most of the clientele will be drinkers/stoners/drug users/hook-upers/one night standers and they are probably not looking for a wife there.

    I still think that in this day and age (and in the current political climate) the best way to find a trad spouse with the right political views and plans for the future is on a niche dating website catering to right-wing, trad people.
    One can (and should, in fact) describe themselves in a detailed way, focusing on what they are looking for in a potential life partner, on describing how they imagine their preferred home/household/family, on explaining their political views, personality, hobbies, likes, physical appearance, health, plans for the future etc.

    If everyone did that (and I really mean: detailed), I think it would be much, much easier for both sides, men and women. We wouldn’t waste so much time and filtering profiles would be more efficient and successful.

    I think that nowadays it is really difficult to meet the right candidate for a spouse and the parent of your children if you live around and work or study with leftists, degenerates, or–at best–normies.

    P.S. Sorry for any typing errors.

    #12311
    OstwindWolf
    Participant

    Das einfachste was ich als Mann einer Frau raten kann ist, um Hilfe zu bitten. Wenn es dabei nur die Frage nach dem Weg ist, kann das oft der simple Einstieg in ein Gespräch sein.
    Den besten Ort um dies zu tun, kann jeder sein. Ob im Geschäft, der Boutique oder in der Einkaufsmeile, der öffentliche Platz oder auch in öffentlichen Gebäuden. Niemals in Bars, Kaffees, Restaurants und schon gar nicht in Kneipen oder Diskotheken. Wieso? Rechnet damit, das die Herren in Begleitung sind.
    Und in Diskotheken und Bars den Mann eurer Vorstellung zu finden ist mehr als gering.
    Seid auch bei einem Korb nicht verzagt. Solange derjenige Sigle ist und nur auch niederen Gründen (aussagen wie ich brauche gerade keine Beziehung oder ich bin seit kurzem Sigle und bleibe erst mal gerne alleine) abwiegelt, hackt ein wenig nach. Nicht zu aufdringlich aber entschlossen.

    • This reply was modified 4 years, 6 months ago by OstwindWolf.
    #12305
    Alpin!
    Participant

    guess what: men also get nervous when they think a woman is really attractive…
    so best way is to just smile at them.
    if you smile at him once, he will notice…do it again and he will come
    its just the easy signal for us men to know its alright 🙂

    #12182
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    As has been pointed out before, a bar is NOT a good place to meet a future husband and father of your children.

    Bars, clubs etc. are used by hookup seekers, people get drunk and high there—-that’s not spouse material.

    And the advice men gave here is really great—-for women who are not obese or ugly, starting a conversation is really easy.

    #8528
    JulezZ
    Participant

    I like to approach men, but most end up not being single. I don’t get flat out rejected. What usually happens, is they politely blow me off. Generally if a guy is scanning the room (he’s looking for a women and is single). Approaching a group is easier, because usually at least one is single, but maybe not the one you want. Often just standing near the guy and smiling at him works. If he’s not into you, his body language will say so. He will move away, avoid eye contact etc. You gotta be careful not to embarrass yourself, as in approaching a guy who happens to be waiting for his girl in the toilet and she walks out to find you trying to talk to her man. There was a table of attractive men and I kept looking over and smiling, then out of anger, one approached me, to tell me none of them were single. Ouch!

    #8341
    Prussian Blue
    Participant

    I agree there are more dating experts than ever and they’re as ineffective as ever. They’ve changed from dating experts to just men’s support groups of sorts. Their shit doesn’t work anymore. Its a chicken and the egg thing too. People will claim PUAs destroyed dating while I’d argue they were doing whatever it took to meet their goals with women whether it be getting laid, a girlfriend or a wife.

    Their stuff helped me make a lot of women happy in Asia where there are actual dating norms and not punitive rejections and contempt for a man shooting his shot. In America its an absolute shit show. Im sure there are some guys running game and meeting their goals with women but I don’t see it outside of the contextual alpha.

    Your advice is classically feminine. “Smile, and wave and then its up to him to approach.” Pretty sound advice. In the era of #metoo she’ll be doing that a lot as it puts all the onus on the man to run things which is the way it was in Asia. It can work as well as me going up to women and saying “hi, Im Prussian Blue.”

    #8304
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Unfortunately the dating gurus and PUA scene has been corrupted by the parasite. Relationships are at their worst yet there are more relationship experts now more than ever, if they were really getting results we would
    Not be seeing the total degeneration of society. Also, do you want to take advice from people who dont have the results you want? It seems like a lot of these so called experts also have not been able to maintain long term relationships. They created the problem as outlined so many times and they pretened to offer a solution, but ita all smoke and mirrors as women and men have a bigger and bigger wedge put between them.

    #8303
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Make strong eye contact and then smile, maybe a little wave. It’s up to him to approach after that. If he does approach fo for some conversation openers like occasion and location, what brings you here, or what do you think of (external thing in environment). You can always ask about his childhood, and of course what does he do for a living. Be yourself and act calm, even if inside you’re not. Hope this helps. It has for me.

    #8048
    Prussian Blue
    Participant

    I had a conversation with someone today. Her friend is married and she met him in a mall. She just went up to her future husband and said “I think you’re cute so I wanted to talk to you.” Its really that easy for women.

    #8007
    Prussian Blue
    Participant

    “That just sounds like a good way to attract a man who’s not really interested in me. I don’t want to pretend to be something I’m not and begin a dishonest relationship”

    That is the same line of thinking that makes you afraid to approach.

    I know this forum is for women, but I’ll chime in since you want answers. I did the PUA thing for a few years and after going through hundreds, maybe thousands of inevitable rejections I’d see the occasional woman approach a man and I’d get offended because its so easy for them. Literally girls in a club giggling and laughing with eachother and then backing into their target “Omg, so sorry!” and then the set was hooked. Its as easy as a lamb going into a wolf’s den and expecting to be eaten. Women are afraid that the wolf wont eat them and which will shatter their ego. So I guess a rhetorical question is: Are you ready to get rejected, be embarrassed and go home alone? If so can you do it without flipping through your phone and messaging guy friends and exes, or swiping on Tinder for validation?

    Here are some crazy openers that have worked for me:
    *in the middle of the city* Hi, do you know where the waterski place is? (I was able to stumble through it and recover and hooked hard for attraction)

    *Running up behind a girl, put my hand on her shoulder and act like I was out of breathe, then quit the act and ask: “Hey how are you?”

    “Does that leopard skin bikini make you run faster? It doesn’t fit you well. I think Panda is more your style.”

    “What flavor is your swimsuit?” The group of girls was confused and I said mine was “x” flavor, then they played the game.

    I walked up to a couple of girls who at the moment were in their makeup bag. I asked them for lipstick. They gave me lip gloss. I put it on my lips then kissed each of them on the cheek. They looked at each other in shock and then asked where I was from. The guys in my group were losing their shit over what I just did and how well it worked.

    “Can you dunk?” to a tall girl.
    “I’d climb you like a tree” to a tall girl.

    This guy has a few good words of advice. His whole talk was good, but there’s some real meat in there. I qued it up to one of the better parts.

    There were also two other situations that were going well, too well, so something went terribly wrong which actually helped.
    She was really, really nervous, so was I (she was HOTT), and there was sand in my bed. I felt like an asshat, but it actually made her feel a lot more comfortable.
    At the full moon party in Thailand we were going down a water slide. I told her to go behind me so I wouldn’t land on her. We landed on the mat and her face smashed into my back HARD! 300 people watching us go down a 15ft slide did and “oof” I thought she broke her nose for sure, and there would be blood and a hospital visit. Luckily she was Taiwanese and her asian nose was ok. In the most ironic way it made us feel more comfortable around me. I wasn’t some smooth talking guy just trying to get laid.

    The essence of breaking ice is to make an uncomfortable situation comfortable. You’re trying to make things comfortable off the bat. Turn that on its ear and seek out discomfort and make it comfortable. As you see in the video, he had a buddy who went up to girls and said “I want to take you to a club where people pee on each other.” Haha, use that one and try to recover.

    Since you’re a woman I have to warn you on openers: DO NOT SHIT TEST AND DO NOT NEG! IT DOESN’T WORK!

    I gave you a lot of rambling information (COFFEE) Just go up and talk. If 10% of what I said makes sense or is useful then I’ve done my job.

    #8006
    V
    Participant

    Anyone else? Best way to approach someone and break the ice? Maybe compliment him, ask him about something he might be interested in?

    #8005
    V
    Participant

    That just sounds like a good way to attract a man who’s not really interested in me. I don’t want to pretend to be something I’m not and begin a dishonest relationship, instead I’m looking for the kind of real love and foundation that I could start a family upon.

    #8000
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Well this is the exactly what I would suggest. Obviously not in a bar because you would never find me sitting there. Your profile indicates that you have masculine traits: athletic, loves firearms, rock climbing. Maybe you want to work on your feminine attitude /body shape /outfit /interests and a pretty smile that will make him want to come and talk to you.

    #7994
    V
    Participant

    I get nervous around men I find attractive. What’s an easy way to break the ice and introduce yourself? Don’t suggest to just sit around and wait for them to come to you: this never works for me.

Viewing 21 posts - 1 through 21 (of 21 total)

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